liverpool defeated newcastle yesterday with a score of 3-0 baby!

*whistles* they played wonderfully even though it was not their homeground. they were in possession during the whole match and more goals could actually have been created. but wow, they really rock my world! :D

gerrad scored a powerful goal by a freekick as lucas opened the ball for him, thus creating the first goal for the match. i shoot up from my sofa and screamed! my granny said she nearly had a heart attack! hahaha. then first minute into the second half, gerrad took a corner, hypia flicked it and kuyt placed it nicely into the goal. no problem at all! the last goal was a lovely ball from gerrad yet again, to babel and he shot it into the goal! i was like,"what can go wrong for liverpool!" they were brilliant. yeahh, gerrad wasnt in top form for the england euros qualifier but heyy, he was the man of the match yesterday!

but no matter how exhilirating the match was yesterday, it was still a lonely 90 mins for me as dad's not in singapore and the other three women in my family do not appreciate soccer. i miss my daddy! it really sucks when you have only one man in your family. sometimes, i wish i had an older brother. or at least a younger brother.

in the past, when daddy used to go overseas, i would tell n how sucky it gets without a man in the family. and n would laugh and said "i'll be the man of your family." all the dreams we had together, just shattered overnight.

i miss you.

NPCC CAMPFIRE today at new bbss holding campus!!! i'm so excited because it has really been aeons since i've sat and sing around the beautiful campfire, like some tribes performing their rituals. ohh man! it brings back treasured memories. shall camwhore, sing and play like crazy tonight!

CAMPFIRE'S BURNING NOW! CAMPFIRE'S BURNING NOW!
BURN BURN BURN!
CAMPFIRE'S BURNING
IN THE DARK DARK NIGHT
WE GO OOOO YEAHH!
YIPPEE YIPPEE YEAHH!

haha. i still remember my campfire songs! :)

i'm so tired i called to take leave today. even after 8 hours of sleep my head is still heavy.

went to blooie's roadhouse at the rail mail yesterday with yishu and suresh. my first time in a bar cum restaurant and i love the atmoshphere :) one best way to chill, i realised, is just sitting, drinking, talking and watching soccer- in dim lights.

initially i was apprehensive because it would be so embarrasing if we cant pass off. but my worries were uncalled for as both guys defintely looked older than 18. so we passed and the drinks kept rolling in. i drank two glasses of margaritas froz, one glass of pina colada, one glass of gin and tonic and two glasses of vodkha. plus a sip here and there of hoegaarden. and i swear it took me so long to get high this time compared to like one year back when a glass of vodkha can send me behaving like a crazy woman.

and the bar was cool because it has a pool table too so we played a few rounds. two bucks per game people -_-. by that time the alcohol in me had started to wear off and i was getting more sober. which was a good thing because what would mommy say when i get home? haha. and high intakes of alchohol always make me urinate like nobody's business. thats probably why the effect is slower. but i dont belive it! suresh and yishu could still keep going. i dont understand how can someone hold so much liquor but ys's face was sure red. haha. yishu gave credits to the constant hang outs with indian friends because together they trained to be good drinkers. hahaha. more late nights out with them, i'd probably reached their standard soon too :)

and the bill chalked up to an alarming $230.70! and they only made me paid 30 bucks! alcohol drinks are so high end. but it was indeed great chilling out, but by the time we left, my head was throbbing and super heavy.

and the waitresses were flirting away with those angmoh men laaarrr. and whats worse is that those angmohs flirt back when the waitresses dont even look good! i asked suresh why's that they only flirt with those caucasians. and he replied,: "money." ahh well its true isnt it.

but one thing's for sure. alcohol cant take away your problems.

ohh i think there are more liverpool fans than man u's or any others. we spotted like 7 people wearing liverpool jerseys/tshirt yesterday in town *whisles* and i dont see anybody cladding on the jerseys of any other FCs, except newcastle. haha. so i came to the conclusion that singapore has more liverpool supporters.

either that, or we liverpool lovers are more expressive in our ernest support of this powerhouse. haha.

thursday was great training for all of us at qss. i mean, we're all so pampered on our clean, even synthetic field, running and dribbling a ball on a patchy, muddy field is definitely a good workout for us. initially we were all pretty unused to the the mud and the unpleasant smell. but eventually, we were like "heyy just throw the mud on me baby!" kind of thing. haha.

soccer on the mud is twice more tiresome than soccer on jjc's field. and i totally enjoy being dirty on thursday. seeing mud smeared on my shoes and whole attire gave me a weird sense of satisfication. haha. soccer and mud just go together!

friendly with the qss girls and despite their small stature, they are brilliant. we lost 3-0 first half, but yiting who was not playing goalie that day did a hat-trick! she was amazing i must say *applause* we lost after conceding another goal to qss (4-3) but it was indeed a very good game :)

towning yesterday with ys again, this time to let off some steam. for SOME reason, bestie made me damn pissed and because of him, i cried at work. i wanted to be angry with him for as long as possible but failed to do so because wandering aimlessly and just chitchatting with ys makes my day :)

purchased a shirt from fleshimp and my troubles were all forgotten. haha.

plus towning on a friday night is so fun because of the crowd, performances on the streets and the beautiful xmas lightings! xmas is really the best season around and it will never fail to lift up everybody's spirits.

conversations with ys are always interesting what with J.C (not = to junior college), homos, pretty girls, cute guys, death, love yadah yadah. and we walked from far east all the way to bugis. the night was pretty cooling, the sights were beautiful, the conversations were engaging and by the time we boarded the mrt, i was ready enough to forgive bestie and say sorry to him too. town and ys = great escape and perfect therapy to my rollarcoaster emotions. haha.

to bestie: i'm sorry too :) just dont do it again alright! love you!

i think prayer changes everything.

and God calms the raging storms in me. He gives me strength to face the darkest moments.

why have i not seen that He is actually my star? and that He's the only one that who can never disappoint me? i miss God, i miss praying, i miss spending time with Him.

but why do i turn to Him only in times of need when all others failed?

Thank you Lord Jesus for always being there and i'm sorry for being a sunday christian. Help me be a more faithful child of yours. Amen.

i've got cravings for hot chocolate. anybody wants to treat me? :)

soccer training rules big time. we jogged from jj to clementi. i must say its indeed an achievement. another level of endurance and perserverance. plus we came across this huge posionous snake as we jogged passed the canal! and we had to quickly run pass it before it strikes. hahaha. how cool! now i know how scary steve irwin's job actually is. but if i have to choose a reptile, give me an iguana. i really want to keep one as my pet. sighs.

pooled with suresh at timah tonight after work. he's a pro and he says i'm not bad so *grins* received a pat on the head from him after a good ball into the pocket. haha. but still got lots to learn and more to practice. but now more importantly, i want to get back my bowling form. hahaha.

supposed to feel good tonight after a few rounds of pool but talking with suresh left me feeling quite down. because n appeared in our topics a few times. and i really miss him.

every conversation we exchange makes me realise that i've really lost you.

tv serial: heroes is really exciting.

and if i were to possess a form of superpower, i want to be able to fly, to soar high up into the sky and take a plunge from the great heights above. and i want to shoot into the universe to grab a star and wish upon it. and wish that i can trust love again. and wish for me to happy and only happiness to be with me.

and if i were to possess another form of superpower, i want to be able to turn invisible on my own will. so i wont have to hide my feelings during the day and appear only during the solitary night. but whenever i feel like i need to disappear, poof! i'm gone. and somewhere i can be crying floods but nobody can see. and probably i should remain invisible for as long as possible. then i'll know if i really do depart from this world, have i left behind footprints in the hearts of people i mixed with.

really, fuck my fucked up feelings :)

A philospher once asked, "Are we human because we gaze at the stars, or do we gaze at the stars because we are humans?" Pointless really.
Do the stars gaze back? Now, that's a question. -Stardust

street soccer with the girls for about 3 hours yesterday and yeahh baby! it totally made my day =D it's been so long since i touched a soccer ball and it feels so good to be able to stop, dribble and take shot. PLUS seeing them all makes me glow with happiness because its been aeons since i've seen them.

after that we went to pool at the civil service club opposite westmall for about 2 hours. it was a ball of a time! chris said we all looked so serious while playing but of course! you know, focus and concentration. i felt that i played quite well yesterday but i didnt managed to play with chai who's our pro haha. but we promised to play with each other soon! :) and ohh jas, despite her bandaged up ankle and slight limp (haha), played like woah too.

and its never enough for the soccer girls. we still went to bowl for awhile. but its been ages since most of us bowl so we were pretty off form. but thats a start. chai will bring us to taman jurong to bowl again right! weeee :)

i love soccer and the girls!

supposed to attend a friend's bday dinner yesterday too but parents booked movie tickets to STARDUST so joined my family instead. and let me advertise this movie because its like one of the best movies i've ever watched! i was totally blown off my seat! it was wonderful and magical! so please go watch it :)

i love fantasy movies.

a happy ending complements a happy start. thus to end my happy entry today, LIVERPOOL VS FULHAM 2-0!RROOAARRSS! *jumps and punches the air* 3 points to liverpool baby! and we shall continue to climb up the epl ladder. torres was sub in and scored at around the 80th minute. indeed, he's a natural and top notch striker :D still liverpool's top scorer. gerrad took a penalty and uh huh uh huh, he striked! though its only a second victory win at anfield but its an encouraging start for liverpool once again!

sometimes, my grandmother's temper and thinking can really frustrate the whole family. and often, she can be a good actress too. haha.

new friends are silver,
old friends are gold.

how true.

every moment when i dwell in the company of my secondary school friends, is equivalent to every second of indescribable happiness. the epitome of my statement is yesterday's deepavali visit to suresh's house.

the old npcc clique met up and i cant explain why or how but it just feels so good. its not just them but when i'm with my other secondary mates as well. there's no need for words or much talk, but the mere presence of each other makes me feel so blessed. and even if we have nothing to do, just sitting down and get all nostalgic about the past, is one of the most enthralling experience. we will laugh about our silliness, frown upon our past mistakes and wonder heyy, are we actually that naive, look back and see how we've grown together, recount the thick and thin we've been through as our frienship continues to develop into an unbreakable bond. relieving all these wonderful memories leaves me feeling bitter-sweet, and often with precipitation that threatens to fall over the edge of my eyes too.

it occurs to me how real seperation is and how inevitable is it in our lives too. we can no longer go about the same thing as we did in the past. because circumstances change and circumstances change people too. your friend might have a different attitude or outlook of life now and to you, he's no longer the old guy. well, you might have changed too. i did. but as the saying goes, change is the only constant (interesting paradox huh), so we've got to accept and adapt to the new them, which is of course, not neccessarily negative. in fact, this is all part of growing together and i believe our friendship will grow stronger.

and it is all up to ourselves to organise gatherings or even take the initiative to message or call the friend whom we've been missing so much. but sometimes, we let our busyness get the better of us and we failed to do what we ought to do, thus paving way for the greying of a friendship. and i am guilty of it all, and nothing can vindicate me.

but right now, i want to say a heartfelt thank you to all my secondary school friends for weaving a wonderful journey in my secondary school life for me. i dont think i will be able to forget any of you. and i'm really sorry for seeming to be neglecting or not answering any calls or smses.

sometimes i really wish for a time machine.

you guys are my shunshine;
who make me happy when
skies are grey.

loves forever.

=D

hello!

liverpool vs beskitas:

8-0!

this is the REDS back on fire baby.

uh huh uh huh.



the other time, i had a dream of a ghost that looks like me. well, i'm not sure if it was meant to be, but i came across a name for that kind of ghost while reading readers' digest. it said "a ghostly double of a living person is known as a doppelganger, which is originated from german language."

upon further research on my part, i've found out that a person would die if he saw his doppelganger. well, like duh because shock will kill u instantly if u come face to face with a person who's a replica of u!

anyway, back to serious business. dopplegangers are generally regarded as harbingers of bad luck. in some traditions, a doppelganger seen by a person's friends or relatives portends illness or danger, while seeing one's own doppelganger is an omen of death. aahh in my dream, the ghostly replica of me was seen by two of my friends. so does it means that a potential disaster is looming nearby? haha. WHATEVER!

and yeahh baby. grey's anatomy tonight :)

i miss soccer trainings alot. was really looking forward to today but i've fallen sick in the middle of the night. woke up with a throbbing headache and realised that i've been attack by the fever bug :( i think its due to too many days of late night sleeps and yet having to wake up so early in the morning for work. so for today, no work and no training for me. just stuck at home rotting my time away. i really feel like crying. i miss the girls and coach and adrenaline rush.

yesterday was jalaine's birthday. so


HAPPY BIRTHDAY

TO YOU DARLING!

after work, went town to watch the rendition with yishu. second m18 movie in the theatres for me. first was knocked up, which was quite sexual. but rendition was different and it was one of the most interesting movies i've ever watched. the movie is about terrorism and how the CIA mistook reese witherspoon's husband (who's an eyptian) for a terrorist due to a terrorist bombing at cape town where her husband was at for a business trip. CIA then kidnapped him when he flew back to washington and put him through a trial of torture to make him confess his act, which was of course, something he had never done. this is called rendition where they can literally make a suspect disappear from the face of the earth. the movie was directed so well, with it being so realistic, i give it 5 stars! haha. seriously, if you can, go watch it. :)

went to n.u.m to buy a tshirt and ohh my. some of the guys there are seriously cute. and yupp, hunky, no questions about that :) especially the tall guy who handed over my merchandise to me *faints* they sure can make a girl blush. HAHA. but back to reality, guys equates to heartaches... or is this just my stereotype point of view? ahh whatever.

witnessesd the subaru hand challenge too. its been two ardous days for the contestants already. they're so determined lar! but of course, who wouldnt do anything for money? i think by the end of the contest, the winners would probably wish that they could have their arm chopped off. haha.

then walked all the way to plaza sing to take mrt from there, reached home late and probably thats why i've fallen ill.

SUCKS.

i want to train hard, i have to.

REDS HELD AT BLACKBURN

Liverpool have extended their unbeaten start to the Premier League season after a 0-0 draw with Blackburn Rovers in a tight game at Ewood Park on Saturday.

The Reds dominated the second half here and they had chances to run away with it, but they must be content with a point after Brad Friedel made a number of great saves and David Bentley cleared a Crouch header off the line.

A draw between Arsenal and Manchester United in the day's early kick off at the Emirates Stadium gave the Reds an opportunity to close the gap at the top of the table, and although they've continued their excellent away form, they'll leave here frustrated.

Injuries to Xabi Alonso and Fernando Torres meant that Rafa had to shuffle his pack for this one and that meant starts for Momo Sissoko, Yossi Benayoun and Ryan Babel. The inclusion of Harry Kewell on the substitutes' bench a welcome boost for the Reds after a horrendous run of injuries.

With Blackburn on a seven game winning run and Liverpool yet to be beaten in the League, a tight game was expected and the early stages did little to suggest anything otherwise. It took 35 minutes before either side had a chance of note and it almost brought a breakthrough for Blackburn.

The Reds had been enjoying plenty of possession without carrying much of a threat and they nearly fell behind when Bentley raced clear and shot against the outside of Pepe Reina's left hand post.

Liverpool responded with the best move of the match in the 41st minute. The quick feet of Yossi Benayoun wrong footing the Rovers defence before Gerrard's pass found Babel and his blistering shot brought an excellent save out of Friedel.

After a dour opening the game was beginning to open up and David Dunn found space on the edge of the Liverpool penalty area and hit a superb shot that came back off the underside of the crossbar with Reina beaten. It was a real let off on the stroke of half time.

The second half was equally as competitive as the first, but Liverpool would go on to create a hatful of chances.

Blackburn thought they'd found a way through when Riise sliced his clearance to McCarthy, but he was quickly closed down by Reds defenders. And Liverpool signalled their intent when Kuyt got free on the right only to get his wires crossed with Gerrard and a good chance was wasted.

Rafa Benitez made a change just after the hour when he replaced Ryan Babel with Harry Kewell and he demonstrated his desire to win and made another attacking move when he replaced Crouch for Benayoun 10 minutes later.

Spurred on by their army of fans, Liverpool went in search of a winner as the game entered the final quarter. And they twice came within a whisker off snatching the points.

First in the 79th minute when Kuyt's pass put Gerrard through and Friedel made another great save; and then when Finnan crossed to Crouch and his header was cleared off the line by Bentley.

Liverpool weren't finished and Kuyt twice had a had chance to win it, but he couldn't find the target. -taken from liverpoolfc.tv


that basically sums it all. see rafa! told you the difference crouch would make!and yupp, in the 6oth min or soon, liverppol managed to unleash their potential. why? partly because crouch and kewel were sub in. haha. and ohh, the commentator said that he is the tallest footballer playing in the barclay's league. how cool!



me and my man!
















the relapse came again.

fuck it because liverpool's playing at their worst today. this is football at its dumps. my dad said the board should sack rafa because his absurd policy of rotation is not working. in fact, BOO to it. i'm feeling so fuck up right now because the match was really rotten. torres, alonso, agger are all recovering so they're not in the game. with 3 good players gone, well, its a disadvantage for liverpool of course, but heyy, there's still other good players like peter crouch. but rafa has to put sissoko in! like wtf because sissoko cant even control the ball properly. miss pass, no foresight. in plain words, he can go be a benchwarmer lar. and today's formation, there's only one striker, dirk kuyt. its like really wtf. rafa should just put peter crouch in lar. based on his performance all these while, he's really doing extremely well. doesnt mr benitez knows that one man can make a huge difference? dont forget crouch scored 3 goals against arsenal in last season's epl.

man! and liverpool's midfield was so strong in the past. look, they played a really good game last week against arsenal. just do the same this match lar! its just blackburn. the midfield cant even control the ball properly and they have no confidence to penetrate or take strikes. this is not liverpool at the beginning. what went wrong? rafa, please wake up. its time to change your strategy. liverpool's already at the 6th position in the league. dont take any more chances with with the poor play in champion league too.

i seriously dont know why i'm feeling this anger and agitation so intensely right now. really fucked up over the first half. maybe its because liverpool is actually more than capable of a good play. but something just went wrong in the middle of the season.

please, just put peter crouch in and sub out sissoko lar.

i cant bring myself to watch the 2nd half anymore. maybe i should just go sleep. its maddening and very 'pek chek' to watch a good team play like shiet. ohh well, maybe 2nd half should be better. the feeling of being disappointed by somebody u thought so highly of is just one word, fuck. :(

hope my next entry would be something like "yays. liverpool scored" :(

had a rather strange and creepy dream yesterday. here goes: i was in school, with these two friends of mine. on that day, they told me that they were able to see spirits and ghosts. and guess what they told me? they said that there was this female ghost which had been following behind me constantly all this while. but the thing is, this female ghost has the face of me =/ in other words, she looks exactly like me. in other OTHER words, she is me. and they said that there is another ghost hovering on top of me wherever i go too. when i woke up, i was like wth what is this kind of dream? it left me dreading the day ahead for no apparent reason.

and when i went to work, i suddenly felt like crying because for a moment, i was kind of subconsciously pulled back in time. i recounted my first day of primary school very vividly, as though i was experiencing it all over again. the first time when i boarded the school bus reluctantly, and through the window, i saw my smiling mother waving at me as the bus drove off. that caused me to cry very badly in the bus because at that point of time i felt so lost, so alone and so afraid. its like u've falllen into a vast ocean, with nothing to support you nor no shore to swim to. the only destination is to sink to the seafloor below. this feeling left me quite disturbed for sometime.

told yishu about my dream and he intepreted it for me. according to him, my dream was telling me that my biggest enemy is myself (thus explaining the ghost which looks like me). and the hovering ghost above my head is my part on not being able to let go of HIM. upon thinking, i really feel that it makes a great lot of sense. sighs. but i'm really on the path of recovery already.

anyway on a lighter note, i wore the cross necklace to work today :)

had a discussion regarding tattoos with suresh two days ago. he really made me think twice about having one. but after much thought, i guess i will still go with it, probably after my As. i dont want a dolphin tattoo anymore. instead, i want the chinese character 'ai' (love), on my back. basically its because i believe in true love, yet true love is hard to be found. i'm not scared of the pain, just scared my dad will kill be upon finding out. haha. went to search for nice chinese characters and i like this one below. shall save it in my comp so next year can give the tattoo artist to refer so that he can tattoo it on my body. haha :)



saw this really cute guy on the train on my way to work. he sat opposite me and after awhile, fell asleep. as usual, people who sleep on trains will always have their head nodding to either side. it was the same for him, except that his head nodded way to much to his left and right that it hit on the people sitting beside him. they were irritated but he continued sleeping anyway. after that, the woman on his right got up and alighted the train. in other words, if he nodded to his right, he would have no shoulders to support his lopsided weight. thus, soon after the woman left, this cute guy toppled over and hit the empty seat. he quickly got up, shook his head a few times and went back to sleep AGAIN! hahaha! ohh my. i was stifling my laughter the whole way through. dont know if i should feel turn on or turn off lar.

work today was not as boring. did filing, photocopying and data entry. time passed faster and was in a happy mood on my way home. japanese tempura dinner awaited for me, as my mommy and maid formed alliance to whip up this special dinner. it tasted really great :)

somehow, i'm all smiles today :)