HAPPY 19TH

BIRTHDAY

MENGLAN!

i hereby announced i'm addicted to DJ MAX! hahaha. thanks to playing it on kah poh's psp, now i'm so hooked onto it. luckily, i've got no psp at home. if not, i swear i'll be practicing throughout the night. ohh my, chai and bestia are so pro in dj max, its like their doing the impossible! i aspire to reach their standard but it definitely will take me another 10000 years. borrowed dear lengshan's psp today and i practically played the game the whole day, and totally dumped maths behind the back of my head.

speaking of maths, screwed the mock test today. cant blame no one except for myself. DIDNT STUDY! i think h1 maths students rather slack, but of course with some exceptions. but anyway, maths is so $%^&#*!!!! i declare myself to be suffering from mathsophobia lar! i've just got this maths blockade that gives me difficulty in grasping this complicated subject. but once again, i've made it through in secondary school, i believe its possible to do so yet again. f9 for amaths all the way and mdm yeo wanted me to drop it. luckily for maths tuition, i passed my amaths with an amazing jump of 6 grades for my Os! so, why not for As? i mean, i've got chai as my tuition teacher yo! she cleared all my doubts in binomial and normal yesterday, something which mr mathai couldnt do in all of his life. hahaha *ahem*

so anyway, smoked my way through the mock test, and am only confident of doing well for the normal question, because it was still fresh in my head. finished it an hour before its due, so got to leave early! damn. i'm rather disgusted with my attitude towards maths. but anyway, i will buck up! cannot treat my As lightly!

i shall overcome my mathsophobia =D

ohh yeahh, i would like a psp for my birthday! *hints to soccerettes* i've changed from ds to psp because psp can play dj max! hahaha.

had a hell of a time after maths test today. friday rules because i could always stay back and play soccer late into the evening, until i cant see all of our faces. played monkey with some of the soccerettes and with ernest winston meng han and rugby ken. it was so exciting but very tiring too. especially when you're the unlucky monkey! i miss playing street soccer, damn.

juniors were having physical training at the same time too, but i believe they were slacking abit too huh. hahaha. what is the jamuna's chinese indian song! and all those O_O jokes! hahaha. ohh by the way, did i mention jam's the second hottest indian babe i've ever seen walking on this earth? the first's aisharaway (forgot how to spell her name!). she's this super beautiful indian actress from india. played penalty shootout with them to decide if we should play captain's ball or soccer. i think they won :( thats why we played captain's ball.

BUT IT WAS DAMN FUN. they're all so good with the ball. so rough also. i like it. my juniors are no push over baby! hahaha. and we played until the sun set and the moon rose (?)! i like it when i have to squint my eyes to look out for my friends hahaha. somehow, we're always unaware when the sky darkens. the process is so gradual, its becomes so natural. haha.

and did i mention our school field/track is so littered with DEAD BEES?! gosh, its their burial ground! its rather an eyesore. poor bees!

AND i saw crystal back in jj today, playing bball. she dyed and highlight her hair like brown? ohh my, makes her even more good looking can? hahaha.

friday rules please! its always the day of the week i look forward to, and dread to say bye with! God, here's a little prayer. Can i have more fridays? :)

studying out at holland v with szeying and co tml at coffeebean! i think i've got to bring extra money. THE SHOPAHOLIC (hahahaha) wants to eat at breko's and i cant pang seh her! going to take bus 185 tml, which i didnt know would go all the way to holland v. used to take two buses! waste time only hahaha.

so, i shall retire for the night now. NIGHTS!

i have been blogging actaully. the only thing is, i didnt posts my entries. because i've got rather little spare time on my hand right now, most of my entries are like half way complete. and so, they are all saved as drafts. today however, i'm determined to ressurect my dead blog! :D

ohhk. now i really know what stress is. as in STRESS. that kind of panicky, i'm-so-tired-but-cannot-sleep i've-got-no-more-time kind of STRESS. on the first day of school last week, i was already feeling the strain. well, blame it on my relaxing attitude that i possessed, in passing the 4 damn weeks of school holidays. but i was down to studying immediately when school reopened! because like what daryl and weizi said, even though i started off late, its still not too late yet.

and the stress i felt initially, was rather a motivation and discipline for me to study, but i'm rather burnt out by week 2! i guess its really much like exercising, running and doing sports. my body is not yet condition to hours of mugging, therefore leading to fatigue easily. however i believe, like stamina, it can be built up! all i have to do is perserve on, and i'll feel better in another week or 2! haha. i've never been so positive about studying before. but during dark times, its always good to look on the bright side! :D

so, the singapore government is encouraging us all to save on our energy usage! HEAR HEAR! my parents have been lamenting on the ever increasing PUB bills and all ever since once upon a time. anyway, thats not the point. the thing is, my school's taking a stringent stand in energy saving too, and from 8am to 9am every day, the air conditioner are all to be switched off! when first implemented, students and teachers alike are supposed to take the initiative to NOT TURN ON THE AIR CON. but like all pampered children this day, of course we feigned ignorance and on the air con anyway. so now, the school decided to control the main switch and yeahh, we cant turn the air cons on from 8 to 9 on our own freewill.

funnily enough, 1 hour without air con seems to kill all the students. we complain about the incredulously hot and humid weather, and how we cannot pay attention in class. even though, there's a fan right there. the fan would definitely not work as well as the air con, but thank God, there's a least a source to lessen the irritations.

i guess thats really human nature. we, for one, dont seem to be able to appreciate and think that for the rest of the hours in school, the HIGH ENERGY CONSUMING AIR CONS will be turned on for us. also, we're so pampered that we have to moan and groan just because of one short hour of "suffering". if you call that, erms, suffering. and then we start blaming the school saying, school so kiam siap, 1 hour of air con money also want to save. hmms, maybe we're really so ignorant to realise how expensive air conditioning is, plus the rising electricity bills. but of course! we're not the ones forking out the money, its the government! but hello! the government revenue are from our parents' income taxes! the botom line is, i really think that singaporeans only know how to complain, despite the flood of blessings they pretend not to notice all around them. they demand for the immediate benefits, and refused to see the bigger picture. our comfort zone unfortunately, is only the size of a matchbox.

whenever the soccerettes meet each other, we'll always hug and kiss and talk to each other at the top of our lungs. my friends commented that our behaviour are the likes of long lost friends. hahaha. well, the thing is, i'm really happy seeing them everyday. i look forward to hanging out with the girls, and dread to say goodbye. its really a sense of belonging and longing haha. i feel the same way for other friends too, like my classmates, old friends, but maybe because i'm not used to expressing my affection in such a flamboyant way to them, i didnt really do so.

but i strongly feel people should express their love for each other through hugs and kisses, at least on the cheeks haha. i really love BEAR HUGS! a hug, an embracing one, really show the love, care and concern people have for each other. whenever i hug someone and say take care, it really gives me a peace of mind, knowing that somehow, she will be alright and happy :) but of course, its rare to see friends of different genders hugging each other as a form of greeting, gratefulness or appreciation. i'm quite shy myself to do so. well, its probably due to our culture, which of course, is nothing wrong. but for the start, girlfriends! hug one another and spread the love! haha.

after school on friday, i ran all the way to the guard house to wait for jingwen to go home together because jasmine wants to chi wo tofu! haha. so i was standing at the entrance of the school gate alone, and i saw noi and his girlfriend walking out from the school canteen. obviously, they're going home, and they would have to walk pass me. i was like, "shit, fuck, where's jingwen!" and so, i quickly walked behind the guardhouse and pretend to look at the theresa and huiying who were running on the track. but in fact, i was hiding like a chicken. i so fucking hate myself for having no guts to face both of them. thank God jingwen came running behind them, so i came out from my hiding place, walked passed them, smiled to noi, and got to jingwen. it was a damn awkward moment! lucky jingwen came just at the right time. i know its really mean of me to think this way, but i wished instead of smiling at him when i walked passed, i should have just shoot out my middle finger. my unpredictable, unreasonable female hormones get all worked up everytime i see any noi-related or noi thingys. but i'm fine after awhile! just that at the bus stop, jasmine and chris openly molested and groped me!

really random thought, but i really like to say "jas & chris". its like so shun kou. like you're saying a brand name, example "hula & co." and "charles & keith" hahaha.

and i really like to thank all my friends whom i shared my father's problem with. thanks for the concern and those encouraging msgs. i feel really blessed. i'm really thankful and relief that my dad is fine, that the results proved negative for stroke. but its not exactly nice news either, to know that he's under tremendous amount of stress and pressure. my dad's health has constantly been weighing on my mind, and his decision to work overseas after he retired from the army does not appeal to me at all.

i didnt used to love my daddy alot because when i was young, my parents used to quarrel alot and also, he always used the rod on me because of my inability to comprehend maths. prob explain my lack of interest towards this very complicating subject haha. however, as i grow older, i realised my dad does love my family alot, and he shows it through meeting our every need and wants. its like, he's really willing to spend money at whatever we want, and not on himself. he also encouraged me to play soccer and he always say to me, "you're a big girl now, sensible already. must know how to make the right choices and discpline your ownself."

after the scare of signs of strokes, i am more against my dad to go overseas to work. and suddenly, it came as a motivation for me to study well, and do well for my A levels so that i can get into the uni and course i want. now that i dont have the ability to support my family yet, i guess i can lessened my daddy's worry through my being self motivation and achieving something which both mom and him can be proud of. i hope in the future, my sis and i can land ourselves in a prospective job and then, my daddy and mommy can enjoy life already! :)

i want to thank God for my ahma, daddy, mommy and sister :D


and YES SPAIN RULES!

Campeones! El cielos es el limite :) even though the jersey is too big for me, i'll still clad it on!

TESTIMONIAL MATCH TODAY! weeets :D and we've officially passed down. i will blog more about it another time!

ohh. and i must say, i really take my hat off xiaxue. she's really one of a kind man. respect her attitude, even though i dont necessarily agree with all her views and opinions. xiaxue reminds me of my very vocal and i'm-not-scared-to-voice-out-my-opinions friends like daryl, jill, junkai, jasmine, weizi and yingying. and i love engaging myself in conversations with them, especially junkai. hahaha :D

random photos!



















jingwen and i were resting at imm, then we played with this ohh-so charming 4 years old boy! and he took photos of us with my handphone cam! i swear i would date him if i could. he actually asked me to find him at imm the next day! haha.




stella's so CUTE lilo and stitch stuff toy

last week, i spent one of my late afternoon watching one of my most favourite movie and story,

Lord of The Ring: Return of The King.

the very first time i fell in love with LOTR was because of legolas (orlando bloom), who is so darn handsome with his long, silky blonde hair and his mesmerizing eyes when he shoots the arroows in battle. but then slowly, i loved the trilogy even more so because of the action, the brotherhood, the courage, the loyalty, the bravery and the fact that good always triumphs over evil, even though all hope may seem lost at first.

many people, or rather many immature youths, like to poke fun of LOTR, saying that its a gay show and all. gay, because the characters who are mostly of the male gender, hug and speak emotional words to each other. well, maybe its because its rather uncomfortable and unusual for us, singaporeans, to actually see bond between man so strong. i mean, how often do we witness guys hug and hold each other? probably only after scoring a goal in a soccer match.

so i'm totally put off when people say LOTR is gay. because it is not. their words are expressions of brotherly love for each other, words of life because they are fighting a battle of death. they hold onto each other because its an act of pushing each other on in such terrible times. being gay is a whole lot more of other things.

"War is the province of man" one warrior in the movie said to lady eowyn, who wants to go into battle to fight alongside her uncle(King of Roahn). but in the end, she was the one who destroyed a monster which is said to be one which "no man can kill". being a female, i was rather proud of that scene and greatly esteemed as well. haha. there is nothing in this world that women cant do.

however, one thing i found rather unfortunate about the story is the fact that the fellowship and all other warriors cheered on and deemed frodo as the hero, throughout the journey and ultimately in the end. i choose to strongly disagree because the ring would have fallen prey into frodo's hand if not for his faithful friend, sam, who pushed and encouraged him along the whole journey to their destination to destroy the ring, mount doom. sam was not tempted by greed for the ring, and neither did he expect anything in return from frodo. he, in fact, saved frodo's life many times, and yet, frodo made the wrong decision not to trust him. the sidekick, as usual, is often forgotten, even though he might be the one who's the true man of honour. its really the same in our real life. when we do well and achieve something, we tend to forget those around us, who had helped us to attain that level. people will cheer for you, but they will never cheer for those who brought you where you are today. irritating reality.

LOTR though, is still a novel and movie, that never fails to blow me off my seat :)

..............................................................................

went to school today to support my juniors for their very 1st soccer match against our "sister school", qss. i was really happy seeing the qss girls again, like valerie for one, because it was really a long time since i've seen them and joke around with them. they didnt seem to grow though, so small and adorable, but lethal on the field. hahaha.

jasmine kept teasing me about coach's assistant, hafiz a.k.a handsome (!!!), because of what coach told us during the chalet. he was the ref for the match anyway. so then i began to like take more notice of him, and to my horror, he reminds me of noi! the shirt he wore, the eyes and his pattern. i see him, i think noi. funny how some people you know reminds you of OTHER people you know.

anyway, the match was pretty fast paced, with definitely lots of crowding and banging into each other. well, i'm sure we were like that in the past. and i'm more sure that my juniors will improve tremendously by next year, considering the many trainings they have compared to us. and also, coach said their match sense is good!

was standing throughout the whole match, and i felt this strong urge to throw myself onto the field to play, even though the weather was like 100000 degree C. i just miss the adrenaline rush on the battlefield. and yiting and chai were just like little coaches, giving instructions off field! haha. i'm sure almost all of us are miss playing soccer alot. so i hope coach would settle the date of our testimonial match asap!

during lunch, we realised that coach said alot of things to either 1) confuse us 2) boost each team's esteem or 3) he's confused himself. hahaha. going to miss coach alot!

and so the hols are drawing to an end! been relaxing myself to the max, and i only studied abit here and there. my vice has become the tv! :( well, even though i spent the hols rejuvenating myself instead of doing what's more right, i can see myself very clearly mugging hard right after school all the way to midnight every day. make it double my O levels days, where i became a nerd before the prelims. haha. starting to panic alittle right now, so these shall be my motivation to study all the way until As are over! somehow, i feel really excited to adpt a constant diliigent attitude towards study. its like a challenge of some sort. hahaha.

ALTHOUGH I'M DREADING

MONDAY! I DONT WANT TO GO

FOR TUTORIALS!

lectures, self-study and alittle soccer would be the perfect timetable everyday proceeding to the examinations!

and cheers turtle! you've finally update your blog :D

off to study for history paper! :D