now, with exams around the corner, i dont take to the practice of blogging during my weekdays, which are really precious. however, its been awhile since i've made these certain observations and i just got to get it off my chest!

i abhor the way some people treat this particular person in my class. lets call him person X. firstly, person X is a very confident being, and he himself admitted that he likes to be in the limelight. person X tends to talk alot as well. for those who read harry potter, person X's character always reminds me of hermoine granger haha. personally, i think that person X is a very nice friend, with a good heart. even though he sometimes may be abit arrogant, i can tell that he sees things in a very simple manner and he is actually a very good natured guy, oftern very supportive as well. as i've mixed and worked with him on many occasions, i'm sure that i am not wrong. however, like hermoine granger, it is not easy to have many true friends when your character is similar to hers.

so some people just criticised and condemned him out right. like even though he had good intentions and did certain things for the class for our own good, they scold or criticised him, call him fucker etc. i've witnessed the same thing so many times, i'm really sad for him. today, i was just sharing my views with szeying and connie overheard, and she had the same sentiments as me too.

and i realised it happens only for guys. as in, only the male gender does this to each other. thinking back, such things also happen in my secondary school. when they identify another guy who seems unfit to or unable to click or tune in to their frequency, they often take to suaning and criticising the person until it seems that they're doing it to a dead wood. in other words, they do it without sparing a single thought for the person's feeling, and ASSUME that the arrows of attacks can bounce of him, without leaving any scars.

i call them VERBAL BULLYING.

"And the tongue is a fire, a world of iniquity. The tongue is so set set among our members that it defiles the whole body, and sets on fire the course of nature; and it is set on fire by hell...With it we bless our God and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in the similitude of God...Out of the same mouth proceed blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not to be so."
James 3:6, 9-10

after all, every living being has PRIDE. to suan, criticise, condemn, mock ect a person can puncture his self esteem really badly. these is worse if you do so when the person 1) treats you as his friend 2) thought you were his friend and 3) when you do it infront of people. so this is what happened in the unfortunate case of person X. i really do not know how he feels when THEY do that to him, but if i were in his shoes, i think what they did can really destroy me. words spoken are really like a sword. it can give life, or take away one.

i know they might do it because they take a dislike to him, and probably could not see eye to eye with his actions or whatever. but to criticise him openly is too selfish an action already. just because you're at an advantage, like you've got the backing of others who behave likewise as you, doesnt mean you've got to treat somebody else like he is a piece of shit.

if you dont like the person, just dont hang out with him! if he tags along with you everytime, you dont have to make conversations with him. such are simple ways that shows him/her that "hey! we cant get along/i dont think i really like you!" if you really cannot tolerate his actions, tell him nicely lar! but when its difficult to let him know his bad points, then you've got no choice but to keep quiet and accept his behaviour.

however, i feel that those people who suan and criticise person X often do it for the sake of fun. it probably started out because they were annoyed, but they also take a peverse joy and satisfaction in seeing his reaction, and just in making him feel miserable. just because "i dont like you".

i think, how a man (i.e mankind haha) treat the people around him can tell alot about his character and his heart. if he treats some like a piece of shit, and others very nicely, he most certainly will treat his future spouse badly too. if he treats some like cockroaches, and others like gold, he most certainly will not give a damn to the poor and handicapped.

to me, verbal bullying is more powerful in causing hurt than physical bullying because emotional and psychological scars are more difficult to heal than the superficial ones. i just hope that person X will not be so affected by the verbal attacks of these selfish people.

NEXT! my greatest eyesore is those ahbeng and ahlian teenagers. here's roughly how all of us stereotype them!

the teenager bengs:
-very thin
-or very fat
-the fringe abit long and they like to give a sudden upward movement of their head to flick the fringe up
-blonde hair
-loves skinny jeans especially red colour. fat ones also love skinny jeans





-smoke
-have earing on one of the ears
-like to swing their hands
-like to swing their hand when they talk too.
example, ah beng: "wah lao, ah huat stare at me just now! KB!" *with fingers outspread, arm does an upward movement (like want to do karate chop like that) while talking*
-every sentence you'll probably hear the word fuck, cb,, ccb, lj, knn, kb, kbkb.
-converse in chinese
-love to stare



-girlfriends are usually ahlians.


teenager ahlians:
-very thin
-blonde hair (abit like my hair colour last year, although the colour WASNT THAT COLOUR WHEN FIRST DYED)
-super thin, layered hair
-loves skinny jeans especially red colour
-love very short shorts too
-love to carry those small small handbags
-smear on super thick make up. SUPER THICK.


hahahaha

-smoke
-have multiple earrings on their ears (LIKE ME! ALTHOUGH OF COURSE, i'm no ahlian!)



-like to swing their hand when they talk.
example, ah lian: "wah lao, ah hua stare at me just now! KB!" *with fingers outspread, arm does an upward movement (like want to do karate chop like that) while talking*
-every sentence you'll probably hear the word fuck, cb,, ccb, lj, knn, kb, kbkb.
-converse in chinese
-love to stare



-boyfriends are usually ahbengs

so basically, these are the stereotypes that i can think of. and whenever a person fits at least 3 of the descriptions above and i see them walking down the street, the first thought that will flash across my mind is "cao(4) ahlian/beng!". actually, we can even tell if a person is a beng/lian when they're in school uniform. it just seems like they have the word "ah beng" or "ah lian" stamped right smacked on the front of their face.

in fact, for my first 3 mth jae intake in jjc, my dyed hair and multiple earrings caused such a misunderstanding! apparently, some of my friends like szeying and lengshan, thought that i was an ahlian!!!! fortunately, i'm actually a very good girl! RIGHT?! :D hahaha.

somehow, i cannot stand the way these beng and lian talk. whenever i hear their conversations, it always seem as though they're talking big. like they like to say "COME LAR! SCARED ARH!" haha. and they also like to disturb people, total strangers on the street. like today for example, got a group of ahbeng boys in school uniform standing at jj's guardhouse there. probably going in to play their life away on the computer, since jj has something like a lan shop in the canteen. so anyway, was chatting with jingwen, chai and lixuan about an embarassing incident. so i went "so paiseh!" as we walked passed the group of them. then after that, some of them started saying very loudly "wah! where got paiseh!" "so paiseh!" crazy kids. so i turned around and stare at them.

they not only like to action when talking, but they're actions also like to action. hahaha. for example, soccerettes last chalet, we unfortunately, were neighbours with a group of bengs and lians. first, we receieved comments about us being bungs from them. secondly, they drank so much, the whole chalet is smelled strongly of alcohol. and glasses of beer were seen laying around on the ground! so anyway, coasta sand pasir ris has this high elements course near the bicycle rental shop. so one night after catching the euros match at mac and walking back to our chalet, this one ahbeng climbed onto the high element thingy and hang on the ladder upside down, showing off to his friends. the way he did it, he think he's some big shot. but the thing is, he couldnt have jumped and reached the ladder. however, there was a car parked below it. so obviously, he climed onto the car to get onto the ladder! i swaer there was shoe prints on the car!

somehow, a part of me will discriminate these bengs/lians. my friends always ask why am i against my own race haha. because there's also the mats and minahs (malays bengs/lians). actually i also dont know why! maybe because to me, i always feel malays are very loyal and speaks strongly of kinhood and friendship. so, these mats and minahs, no matter how mat or minah are they (haha), they will always respect their family and elders. or maybe, its just merely because i have this thing for malay guys hahahaha. i think mats are stylo lor! even though they love wearing skinnys too! hahaha.

so anyway, sometimes i get so pissed off with these ahbengs/lians, and i always think what the hell are they doing in our society. they're really like a burden to singapore. they're deliquent ways have only negative impacts on our society for example, higher crime rates, more teenage pregnancy, school dropouts probably even without an O level cert and cant speak proper english which would probably lead to leakages in the economic workforce in the future, congregating at hdb void decks therefore intimidating people and posing as nusiances, bad examples to their children when they get married and have kids etc. sometimes, when i get really pissed off, i'll think that they are the scum of the society, useless and should be eradicated. they're good for nothing because they are perfectly normal teenagers, who are capable of doing something productive, but chose to become a liability instead.

however, to say that they're a scum and condemn them to quickly is really very judgemental. i've know of people who changed from bengs to someone else much better. i think, the bottomline is, people can change and turn over a new leaf. and probably, these bengs/lians are just going through a very hormonal phase in their teenagehood, therefore behaving like- bengs and lians! haha. but people usually change for the better when the grow older, although maturity does not neccesseraily comes with age. but thats another point. haha. the thing is, i'm always hopeful that these group of teenagers will one day find something productive to do with their life, and not just hanging around in groups and thought that they are really happy. because i believe, one can never really attain true happiness when wasting their short life on earth away. God bless them!

phew! finally i'm done :D i could very well write a gp essay now lar haha. in fact, there's another group of people which i cannot stand, and that is those toots who love to criticise our singapore government. but i'll blog about that another time, when i've got the time and feel like it! haha. but anyway, i'm a super patriotic singapore citizen who thinks that living in singapore is a true blessing. hahaha! so i really get very F up when people complain about my government and my country.




OHHK! ADIOS! time for mugging again :D

i have been blogging actaully. the only thing is, i didnt posts my entries. because i've got rather little spare time on my hand right now, most of my entries are like half way complete. and so, they are all saved as drafts. today however, i'm determined to ressurect my dead blog! :D

ohhk. now i really know what stress is. as in STRESS. that kind of panicky, i'm-so-tired-but-cannot-sleep i've-got-no-more-time kind of STRESS. on the first day of school last week, i was already feeling the strain. well, blame it on my relaxing attitude that i possessed, in passing the 4 damn weeks of school holidays. but i was down to studying immediately when school reopened! because like what daryl and weizi said, even though i started off late, its still not too late yet.

and the stress i felt initially, was rather a motivation and discipline for me to study, but i'm rather burnt out by week 2! i guess its really much like exercising, running and doing sports. my body is not yet condition to hours of mugging, therefore leading to fatigue easily. however i believe, like stamina, it can be built up! all i have to do is perserve on, and i'll feel better in another week or 2! haha. i've never been so positive about studying before. but during dark times, its always good to look on the bright side! :D

so, the singapore government is encouraging us all to save on our energy usage! HEAR HEAR! my parents have been lamenting on the ever increasing PUB bills and all ever since once upon a time. anyway, thats not the point. the thing is, my school's taking a stringent stand in energy saving too, and from 8am to 9am every day, the air conditioner are all to be switched off! when first implemented, students and teachers alike are supposed to take the initiative to NOT TURN ON THE AIR CON. but like all pampered children this day, of course we feigned ignorance and on the air con anyway. so now, the school decided to control the main switch and yeahh, we cant turn the air cons on from 8 to 9 on our own freewill.

funnily enough, 1 hour without air con seems to kill all the students. we complain about the incredulously hot and humid weather, and how we cannot pay attention in class. even though, there's a fan right there. the fan would definitely not work as well as the air con, but thank God, there's a least a source to lessen the irritations.

i guess thats really human nature. we, for one, dont seem to be able to appreciate and think that for the rest of the hours in school, the HIGH ENERGY CONSUMING AIR CONS will be turned on for us. also, we're so pampered that we have to moan and groan just because of one short hour of "suffering". if you call that, erms, suffering. and then we start blaming the school saying, school so kiam siap, 1 hour of air con money also want to save. hmms, maybe we're really so ignorant to realise how expensive air conditioning is, plus the rising electricity bills. but of course! we're not the ones forking out the money, its the government! but hello! the government revenue are from our parents' income taxes! the botom line is, i really think that singaporeans only know how to complain, despite the flood of blessings they pretend not to notice all around them. they demand for the immediate benefits, and refused to see the bigger picture. our comfort zone unfortunately, is only the size of a matchbox.

whenever the soccerettes meet each other, we'll always hug and kiss and talk to each other at the top of our lungs. my friends commented that our behaviour are the likes of long lost friends. hahaha. well, the thing is, i'm really happy seeing them everyday. i look forward to hanging out with the girls, and dread to say goodbye. its really a sense of belonging and longing haha. i feel the same way for other friends too, like my classmates, old friends, but maybe because i'm not used to expressing my affection in such a flamboyant way to them, i didnt really do so.

but i strongly feel people should express their love for each other through hugs and kisses, at least on the cheeks haha. i really love BEAR HUGS! a hug, an embracing one, really show the love, care and concern people have for each other. whenever i hug someone and say take care, it really gives me a peace of mind, knowing that somehow, she will be alright and happy :) but of course, its rare to see friends of different genders hugging each other as a form of greeting, gratefulness or appreciation. i'm quite shy myself to do so. well, its probably due to our culture, which of course, is nothing wrong. but for the start, girlfriends! hug one another and spread the love! haha.

after school on friday, i ran all the way to the guard house to wait for jingwen to go home together because jasmine wants to chi wo tofu! haha. so i was standing at the entrance of the school gate alone, and i saw noi and his girlfriend walking out from the school canteen. obviously, they're going home, and they would have to walk pass me. i was like, "shit, fuck, where's jingwen!" and so, i quickly walked behind the guardhouse and pretend to look at the theresa and huiying who were running on the track. but in fact, i was hiding like a chicken. i so fucking hate myself for having no guts to face both of them. thank God jingwen came running behind them, so i came out from my hiding place, walked passed them, smiled to noi, and got to jingwen. it was a damn awkward moment! lucky jingwen came just at the right time. i know its really mean of me to think this way, but i wished instead of smiling at him when i walked passed, i should have just shoot out my middle finger. my unpredictable, unreasonable female hormones get all worked up everytime i see any noi-related or noi thingys. but i'm fine after awhile! just that at the bus stop, jasmine and chris openly molested and groped me!

really random thought, but i really like to say "jas & chris". its like so shun kou. like you're saying a brand name, example "hula & co." and "charles & keith" hahaha.

and i really like to thank all my friends whom i shared my father's problem with. thanks for the concern and those encouraging msgs. i feel really blessed. i'm really thankful and relief that my dad is fine, that the results proved negative for stroke. but its not exactly nice news either, to know that he's under tremendous amount of stress and pressure. my dad's health has constantly been weighing on my mind, and his decision to work overseas after he retired from the army does not appeal to me at all.

i didnt used to love my daddy alot because when i was young, my parents used to quarrel alot and also, he always used the rod on me because of my inability to comprehend maths. prob explain my lack of interest towards this very complicating subject haha. however, as i grow older, i realised my dad does love my family alot, and he shows it through meeting our every need and wants. its like, he's really willing to spend money at whatever we want, and not on himself. he also encouraged me to play soccer and he always say to me, "you're a big girl now, sensible already. must know how to make the right choices and discpline your ownself."

after the scare of signs of strokes, i am more against my dad to go overseas to work. and suddenly, it came as a motivation for me to study well, and do well for my A levels so that i can get into the uni and course i want. now that i dont have the ability to support my family yet, i guess i can lessened my daddy's worry through my being self motivation and achieving something which both mom and him can be proud of. i hope in the future, my sis and i can land ourselves in a prospective job and then, my daddy and mommy can enjoy life already! :)

i want to thank God for my ahma, daddy, mommy and sister :D


and YES SPAIN RULES!

Campeones! El cielos es el limite :) even though the jersey is too big for me, i'll still clad it on!

TESTIMONIAL MATCH TODAY! weeets :D and we've officially passed down. i will blog more about it another time!

ohh. and i must say, i really take my hat off xiaxue. she's really one of a kind man. respect her attitude, even though i dont necessarily agree with all her views and opinions. xiaxue reminds me of my very vocal and i'm-not-scared-to-voice-out-my-opinions friends like daryl, jill, junkai, jasmine, weizi and yingying. and i love engaging myself in conversations with them, especially junkai. hahaha :D

random photos!



















jingwen and i were resting at imm, then we played with this ohh-so charming 4 years old boy! and he took photos of us with my handphone cam! i swear i would date him if i could. he actually asked me to find him at imm the next day! haha.




stella's so CUTE lilo and stitch stuff toy

last week, i spent one of my late afternoon watching one of my most favourite movie and story,

Lord of The Ring: Return of The King.

the very first time i fell in love with LOTR was because of legolas (orlando bloom), who is so darn handsome with his long, silky blonde hair and his mesmerizing eyes when he shoots the arroows in battle. but then slowly, i loved the trilogy even more so because of the action, the brotherhood, the courage, the loyalty, the bravery and the fact that good always triumphs over evil, even though all hope may seem lost at first.

many people, or rather many immature youths, like to poke fun of LOTR, saying that its a gay show and all. gay, because the characters who are mostly of the male gender, hug and speak emotional words to each other. well, maybe its because its rather uncomfortable and unusual for us, singaporeans, to actually see bond between man so strong. i mean, how often do we witness guys hug and hold each other? probably only after scoring a goal in a soccer match.

so i'm totally put off when people say LOTR is gay. because it is not. their words are expressions of brotherly love for each other, words of life because they are fighting a battle of death. they hold onto each other because its an act of pushing each other on in such terrible times. being gay is a whole lot more of other things.

"War is the province of man" one warrior in the movie said to lady eowyn, who wants to go into battle to fight alongside her uncle(King of Roahn). but in the end, she was the one who destroyed a monster which is said to be one which "no man can kill". being a female, i was rather proud of that scene and greatly esteemed as well. haha. there is nothing in this world that women cant do.

however, one thing i found rather unfortunate about the story is the fact that the fellowship and all other warriors cheered on and deemed frodo as the hero, throughout the journey and ultimately in the end. i choose to strongly disagree because the ring would have fallen prey into frodo's hand if not for his faithful friend, sam, who pushed and encouraged him along the whole journey to their destination to destroy the ring, mount doom. sam was not tempted by greed for the ring, and neither did he expect anything in return from frodo. he, in fact, saved frodo's life many times, and yet, frodo made the wrong decision not to trust him. the sidekick, as usual, is often forgotten, even though he might be the one who's the true man of honour. its really the same in our real life. when we do well and achieve something, we tend to forget those around us, who had helped us to attain that level. people will cheer for you, but they will never cheer for those who brought you where you are today. irritating reality.

LOTR though, is still a novel and movie, that never fails to blow me off my seat :)

..............................................................................

went to school today to support my juniors for their very 1st soccer match against our "sister school", qss. i was really happy seeing the qss girls again, like valerie for one, because it was really a long time since i've seen them and joke around with them. they didnt seem to grow though, so small and adorable, but lethal on the field. hahaha.

jasmine kept teasing me about coach's assistant, hafiz a.k.a handsome (!!!), because of what coach told us during the chalet. he was the ref for the match anyway. so then i began to like take more notice of him, and to my horror, he reminds me of noi! the shirt he wore, the eyes and his pattern. i see him, i think noi. funny how some people you know reminds you of OTHER people you know.

anyway, the match was pretty fast paced, with definitely lots of crowding and banging into each other. well, i'm sure we were like that in the past. and i'm more sure that my juniors will improve tremendously by next year, considering the many trainings they have compared to us. and also, coach said their match sense is good!

was standing throughout the whole match, and i felt this strong urge to throw myself onto the field to play, even though the weather was like 100000 degree C. i just miss the adrenaline rush on the battlefield. and yiting and chai were just like little coaches, giving instructions off field! haha. i'm sure almost all of us are miss playing soccer alot. so i hope coach would settle the date of our testimonial match asap!

during lunch, we realised that coach said alot of things to either 1) confuse us 2) boost each team's esteem or 3) he's confused himself. hahaha. going to miss coach alot!

and so the hols are drawing to an end! been relaxing myself to the max, and i only studied abit here and there. my vice has become the tv! :( well, even though i spent the hols rejuvenating myself instead of doing what's more right, i can see myself very clearly mugging hard right after school all the way to midnight every day. make it double my O levels days, where i became a nerd before the prelims. haha. starting to panic alittle right now, so these shall be my motivation to study all the way until As are over! somehow, i feel really excited to adpt a constant diliigent attitude towards study. its like a challenge of some sort. hahaha.

ALTHOUGH I'M DREADING

MONDAY! I DONT WANT TO GO

FOR TUTORIALS!

lectures, self-study and alittle soccer would be the perfect timetable everyday proceeding to the examinations!

and cheers turtle! you've finally update your blog :D

off to study for history paper! :D