(un)Valentine's Day;
Its sunday, the end of yet another week.
My week's been pretty intense, with tutorials, soccer training, double cellgroups and services. I'm tired, but I've never felt better! Pst Niko's service was very encouraging, and the praise and worship for both days were amazing. It touches my heart to see people praising God wholeheartedly, especially on Saturday; where so many young people like me were dancing for joy in the house of God and lifting their hands in earnest worship.
So, Samuel and I were talking on Saturday, and he reminded me that Valentine's day was like only 2 weeks away. And I went, oh yeah, it falls on the first day of Chinese new year! And in my heart, I was like "Sc*** Valentine's Day!"
I know how Valentine's Day is not exclusively reserved only for couples. Its a day of love, and we can spend it with our friends and family as well. But then, its usually couples who celebrate V'day isnt it? You see hearts, lovey dovey gifts around etc; love is in the air (sigh)!
My last V'day spent with a special someone was like 3 years ago. Wow, I've been single for 3 years already! And so, of course, I havent been celebrating it. Well, yeah, I did bake cookies for friends and all, but thats that. What I meant was, I havent celebrate it with someone special.
People say, being single is great, more freedom, I can do anything I want, I'm not tied down, why would I want to get attached, I mean, I can date all the people in town, I wont have to be heartbroken blah blah blah. You know what, THEY ARE LYING. LIARRRRRRRRRRRRRRSSSSSSSSSSS.
"The greatest thing you'll ever learn is to love and be loved in return." When you've loved once, and been loved before, you will never choose singlehood. Or at least I will never. I really think people are saying all the great stuff about being single only to make themselves feel abit better. Because I say that sometimes too. And I know its a lie.
I'd rather want to spend my v'day with a guy who holds my hand, who gives me sunflowers and tells me how much he loves me, and makes me laugh by burping, and hugs me tight like I'm his life, and I want to spend my v'day with him, and I will hold his hand, and give him my heart and tell him how much he means to me, and make him laugh by acting cute, and hug him tight like he's my life.
I know I may sound so shallow, or maybe desperate or whatever. But I dont care. I know whats its like to be love, and I miss that feeling so much sometimes. When I see photos of my friends with their boyfriends or vice versa, when I see val and her bf spending time together, when I see mommy and daddy, I will think "When is it going to be my turn again? Never again?"
I know how people say you're still young lar, got so many more years to go. But whatever. I just want more years to spend with that special someone what!
To tell you the truth, I hate seeing couples holding hands, smiling into each other's eyes, talking so sweetly to each other and all that other mushy lovey dovey stuff. But it makes me so touch at the same time. Bittersweet. Argh.
Thats why I've dreaded and hated feb 14th for the past two years, and I'm sure this year will be no exception. 14th feb's just too overwhelming for me. I'm not a huge fan of it. I will feel depressed and suffocated, and somehow 24 hours later, I'll be normal again. Its like the full moon for the werewolves you know.
Sometimes I think there's really something wrong with me lar. Maybe I'm too boyish or too spoilt or too ugly or too fat or whatever thats why still single. Haha.
Hmm, so I'm rather glad this year, that at least v'day is not an isolated event itself. At least it falls on the first day of Chinese new year. Which makes things better I guess. Cause in the noise of "pong ah!" and in the busyness of collecting angbao, winning money, and eating like hungry ghosts, the effects of v'day will be drown out. And I'd have better things to do instead of thinking about all the lovey couples saying I love you to each other. Haha.
So dont ever believe anyone, anymore, if they say being single is great. Its bullshit. Who doesnt want to be love man? Who doesnt want to have a chance or another opportunity to think for days, of the best and most special present you can make or buy for the one you love?
Well, they say 2012 the earth ruptures (although thats bullshit too). So, I hope that at least in 2011, I'll get to a happy girl on vday. Haha. Like that, 2012 wont be so bad!
------------------------------------------
Footnote: This is not an emo post. Its just an expression of my feelings and thoughts towards love and vday and singlehood. Haha.
And I'm still going to catch the movie Valentine's Day, because there's Taylor Lautner, and many other hot stars like Jessica Alba and Taylor Swift and the list goes on!
Love,
theresa 30th jan '10 8:57pm
My week's been pretty intense, with tutorials, soccer training, double cellgroups and services. I'm tired, but I've never felt better! Pst Niko's service was very encouraging, and the praise and worship for both days were amazing. It touches my heart to see people praising God wholeheartedly, especially on Saturday; where so many young people like me were dancing for joy in the house of God and lifting their hands in earnest worship.
So, Samuel and I were talking on Saturday, and he reminded me that Valentine's day was like only 2 weeks away. And I went, oh yeah, it falls on the first day of Chinese new year! And in my heart, I was like "Sc*** Valentine's Day!"
I know how Valentine's Day is not exclusively reserved only for couples. Its a day of love, and we can spend it with our friends and family as well. But then, its usually couples who celebrate V'day isnt it? You see hearts, lovey dovey gifts around etc; love is in the air (sigh)!
My last V'day spent with a special someone was like 3 years ago. Wow, I've been single for 3 years already! And so, of course, I havent been celebrating it. Well, yeah, I did bake cookies for friends and all, but thats that. What I meant was, I havent celebrate it with someone special.
People say, being single is great, more freedom, I can do anything I want, I'm not tied down, why would I want to get attached, I mean, I can date all the people in town, I wont have to be heartbroken blah blah blah. You know what, THEY ARE LYING. LIARRRRRRRRRRRRRRSSSSSSSSSSS.
"The greatest thing you'll ever learn is to love and be loved in return." When you've loved once, and been loved before, you will never choose singlehood. Or at least I will never. I really think people are saying all the great stuff about being single only to make themselves feel abit better. Because I say that sometimes too. And I know its a lie.
I'd rather want to spend my v'day with a guy who holds my hand, who gives me sunflowers and tells me how much he loves me, and makes me laugh by burping, and hugs me tight like I'm his life, and I want to spend my v'day with him, and I will hold his hand, and give him my heart and tell him how much he means to me, and make him laugh by acting cute, and hug him tight like he's my life.
I know I may sound so shallow, or maybe desperate or whatever. But I dont care. I know whats its like to be love, and I miss that feeling so much sometimes. When I see photos of my friends with their boyfriends or vice versa, when I see val and her bf spending time together, when I see mommy and daddy, I will think "When is it going to be my turn again? Never again?"
I know how people say you're still young lar, got so many more years to go. But whatever. I just want more years to spend with that special someone what!
To tell you the truth, I hate seeing couples holding hands, smiling into each other's eyes, talking so sweetly to each other and all that other mushy lovey dovey stuff. But it makes me so touch at the same time. Bittersweet. Argh.
Thats why I've dreaded and hated feb 14th for the past two years, and I'm sure this year will be no exception. 14th feb's just too overwhelming for me. I'm not a huge fan of it. I will feel depressed and suffocated, and somehow 24 hours later, I'll be normal again. Its like the full moon for the werewolves you know.
Sometimes I think there's really something wrong with me lar. Maybe I'm too boyish or too spoilt or too ugly or too fat or whatever thats why still single. Haha.
Hmm, so I'm rather glad this year, that at least v'day is not an isolated event itself. At least it falls on the first day of Chinese new year. Which makes things better I guess. Cause in the noise of "pong ah!" and in the busyness of collecting angbao, winning money, and eating like hungry ghosts, the effects of v'day will be drown out. And I'd have better things to do instead of thinking about all the lovey couples saying I love you to each other. Haha.
So dont ever believe anyone, anymore, if they say being single is great. Its bullshit. Who doesnt want to be love man? Who doesnt want to have a chance or another opportunity to think for days, of the best and most special present you can make or buy for the one you love?
Well, they say 2012 the earth ruptures (although thats bullshit too). So, I hope that at least in 2011, I'll get to a happy girl on vday. Haha. Like that, 2012 wont be so bad!
------------------------------------------
Footnote: This is not an emo post. Its just an expression of my feelings and thoughts towards love and vday and singlehood. Haha.
And I'm still going to catch the movie Valentine's Day, because there's Taylor Lautner, and many other hot stars like Jessica Alba and Taylor Swift and the list goes on!
Love,
theresa 30th jan '10 8:57pm
posted by theresa at
3:20 AM
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