happy 18th birthday

elaine!

spending elaine's birthday today was one of the best moments. brenda played the guitar and we all sang simple plan's song and some others too. elaine laughed and cried, and standing there, i know deep down, that this team is one of the most beautiful thing that could happened.

today, i was rather heavy hearted throughtout the match as i played the first half without most of them. i turned to my left and looked to my right on the pitch, expecting to find the familiar faces and sense of confidence each time i prepare to give a pass to them, but none came. coach kept substituting in the j1s and even into the second half, we all took the back seat.

being the pioneer batch, we did almost everything just among the 14 of us. no seniors nothing. just coach, miss lim and us. now, the new year brings along new j1s, new intakers who will share our pitch and every training. who will share the name we call ourselves, be it 'team' or 'soccerettes'. its no longer just the 14 of us, in our red jersey or green, no longer just the 14 of us in each training, with coach drilling us til our lungs cry out. no longer the 14 of us pushing each other and encouraging each other on. no longer.

we need the j1s so that women's soccer can continue. we've brought our cca thus far, and we dont want to see it collapse. to know that there are so many of them interested, we should be happy. but learning to accept them and to accept the fact that its no longer the 14 of us is not easy at all. its like an invasion of one's territory, or rather like sharing your husband with another woman kind of thing. many times, i felt like crying. i dont want anything to change at all. for me, or for all of us. its selfish on my part, i know. but thats how it is, how i feel.

gosh, i love you all :)






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easter service was great, but i think expo's drama would be even better! Good Friday is surely good, for Jesus died for all our sins so that we could be reconciled with God. And Easter Sunday is the day to celebrate, because death no longer hold reign over man! :) Whether its the bondage of sickness, sins, doubts, shame or anything negative, we can find light in God :)

Isaiah 53:3-9, 12

He is despised and rejected by men,
A Man of sorrows and acquainted with grief.
And we hid, as it were, our faces
from Him;
He was despised, and we did not
esteem Him.
Surely He has borne our griefs
And carried our sorrows;
Yet we esteemed Him stricken,
Smitten by God, and afflicted.
But He was wounded for our
transgression,
He was bruised for our iniquities;
The chatisement for our peace was
upon Him,
And by His stripes we are healed
All we like sheep have gone astray;
We have turned, every one, to his own way;
And the Lord has laid on Him the
iniquity of us all.

He was oppressed and He was
afflicted,
Yet He opened not His mouth;
He was led as a lamb to the
slaughter,
And as a sheep before its shearers is
silent,
So He opened not His mouth.
He was taken from prison and from
judgement,
And who will declare His
generation?
For He was cut off from the land of
the living;
For the transgression of My people
He was stricken.
And they made His grave with the
wicked-
But with the rich at His death,
Because He had done no violence,
Nor was any deceit in His mouth.

Because He poured out His soul
unto death,
And He was numbered with the
transgressors,
And He bore the sin of many,
And made intercession for the
transgressors (v12).

i love my family! mom and dad have been great, buying me lots of stuff lately. and treating me to fish and co. sis is busy with her boyfriend but still, she's willing to listen to all my nonsense. granny is the cutest and always makes me laugh. and my maid is great too! :D i feel blessed.